Leaving the Nest

I always thought that the natural trajectory of one's life included going off to college and having an adventure.  As a parent of college aged kids, I thought the natural steps were that THEY would go off to college and I would be left an empty nester, either wallowing in tears and in need of a puppy, or hooting and hollering in celebration as I started planning outings with friends.

Well, I never left for college.  Introvert that I am, I stayed close to home, literally.  I commuted to college and enjoyed the quiet and privacy of my own bedroom.  No dorm parties for this girl!  I guess my parents didn't get to wallow or whoop it up.

And now, at an age where my own children are the ones to be leaving, I find it is me, instead, that is departing the nest.  An unexpected turn of events for all involved.

This sojourn to Oregon feels like what I imagine it WOULD have felt like had I gone away to college or off to a new job after graduation.  And I got to wondering, how similar, really, are the two?

So I went online and found an article describing the 8 things first year college students fear the most.  Let's see how I compare:

1. Am I smart enough?
Well, I'm assuming no one will actually make me take any tests or give me any grades as I muddle through this unknown territory of living on my own in a strange place.  But, on a certain level, I suppose I wonder if I'll "make the cut."  I mean, I've got a business to run...will I be able to keep up with whatever business acumen people in Oregon have?  As an Oregonian with no experience being an Oregonian, can I even call myself an Oregonian?  And will I be judged by my ability to pronounce "Willamette?"

2. Will my roommate be weird?
Well, that's an obvious one.  He is indeed.  My cat Bo has OCD and licks window blinds and all the fur off his belly.  THAT'S pretty weird.

3. Where's my new best friend?
I do wonder this.  My best friends are currently on the east coast and I'll be far away, though only a phone call away.  But I do think about the possibilities.  Maybe a new awesome friendship awaits me.  I certainly hope I find some gal pals to hang out with to see movies, do lunch, go for bike rides, go to the theater, practice yoga...lots of possibilities.  I'm optimistic and saying things to myself like, "What if my next new friend has a vacation home at the coast that she frequently invites me to?"  That kind of thing.

4. Will I be okay without my folks, my dog, and my car?
At my age, my "folks" aren't so much parents or even family, but my people.  My church community has become my family, and I will miss them terribly, and have relied on them for so much over the years in the way of support and guidance.  I am happy to report that I have already connected with some people at a church in Eugene, so hope to develop a support system there too.  I don't have a dog, but I do have a cat, and he is my roommate, so I don't have to live without him!  And car...yes, that's still up in the air.  I'm selling my car here in Virginia, renting a car for a week when I get to Oregon...and then?  Still don't know...biking is very popular there, and I've never tried Uber...we shall see.  Also, my company car, a white Mercedes Benz, is available at my next promotion...

5. Where's the party?
See, this one flummoxes me.  I didn't go away to college cuz I didn't want to be forced to party 24/7.  I'm not saying I never did, but it wasn't my reason for going to college.  And now, 37 years later, I find I don't drink, don't like to stay up late, and avoid large crowds.  So, unless you are defining "party" as a few friends hanging out cooking together or some happy five-year-olds popping balloons, I'm not looking for a party.  But that being said, I do hope to make friends and connections and have a social life.

6. Peer pressure for sex.
Well...unless there's some things I don't know about Oregon yet, I'm fairly certain this won't be an issue.  Now, I do hear that Portland has an annual naked bike race...but naked and sex are really two different things, and Portland's going to be about 3 hours away.

7. Where's the money?
Hopefully, in my bank account from the sale of my house here in Virginia, and quickly to be followed by an avalanche of success as my business takes off into the stratosphere!!

8. Is it safe here?
I have thought about this, being a woman on her own.  And I guess it boils down to this.  I mostly trust people are good.  I don't roam dark alleys alone at night with my head down, and just in case, I bought a pepper spray.  But joking aside, of course there's apprehension about the unknown.  But I do feel confident that my life will be good, and certainly no LESS safe than here in Manassas.

So off I head to my new adventure with the greenness and enthusiasm of a high school graduate mixed with the experience and confidence of a mature woman.  A mature woman that apparently likes hanging out with five-year-olds popping balloons.